In search of… A REAL BAGEL! – Evan Jacobson: Drums, Music, & Food

In search of…a BAGEL! The wanna-be gourmet returns from vacation… 11/11/11 (I couldn’t wait until 12/12/12 for this blog)

Pictured above: The INCREDIBLE Everything Bagel from David’s Bagels, NYC…

Pictured below: Evan makes bagels at home:

Maryland is known for crab cakes, but lacks quality in the bagel department. Sure, I can physically find several bagel prototypes, but something is missing from translation. Perhaps my judgment is eschewed and biased because I grew up in New York. Bagel places were a dime a dozen (technically a baker’s dozen is 13 and much more than 10 cents) and I never really imagined a life sans bagels. For the first 23 years of my life, bagels were omnipresent in the 5 boroughs of New York City. I consumed most bagels from Staten Island and Brooklyn (New Jersey entered the picture later on…).When I moved to Southwest Virginia in 1993 for graduate school, withdrawal symptoms were apparent. In fact, I vividly remember going to Darrell’s Mart in Radford, Virginia, and seeing people lined up for Breakfast. They were holding a cheap paper plate covered with a lumpy spotted Plaster of Paris. The guy couldn’t serve it fast enough and people were inhaling it as if Armageddon was approaching. I turned to one of my friends and asked the profound question, “what are they eating?” “That’s biscuits and gravy,” he replied. “People actually eat that stuff for Breakfast?” I responded, in a flummoxed manner. “You’re not from around here, are you…” Ya think? I couldn’t begin to describe the magnitude of culture shock. In the back of my mind, I was wondering where I could find the nearest bagel place instead of clogging my arteries with that enigmatic slimy white substance on a cost cutter plate. That was probably the beginning of an endless soul search, as long as I lived outside of New York City. Not only was I exploring new territory, but I was trying to hold on to 23+ years of 1 particular food to define the essence of who I am. It might be cliché, but you are what you eat. I care about bagels as much as a Southerner yearns for biscuits and gravy or a Hispanic person who craves rice, beans, chicken, and plantains. Hence, we define ourselves from the food memories of our past–especially childhood–and we don’t realize how much we appreciate food until it’s emotionally unavailable.

How can I describe a great tasting Bagel? Just look at the golden brown exterior of the Everything Bagel (poppy and sesame seeds, Kosher salt, garlic, onion, etc.). When you bite into it, the crunch is deafening and the inner fluffy texture is as soft as a feathered pillow. The flavor is neither white bread, nor Kaiser Roll. At times, the flavor reminds me of a baked New York City Pretzel purchased from a street vendor; the intense charcoal aroma draws people in. However, there is no smoky flavor in a bagel, but there is an element of sour dough. There is (AHEM) supposed to be BARLEY MALT in a bagel. In short, I know a great bagel when it’s being dissolved in my mouth. Finally, the bagel flavor should be enigmatically great BEFORE you spread butter or a “shmear” of cream cheese on it. Check out this “fluffy” bagel:

How does one actually make a great bagel? How does one “become a janitor?” This is the “lost in translation” part. Does it start with a special blend of water ONLY available from New York? What kind of flour is used—Pillsbury? High-Gluten? Bleached? Unbleached? Special oven? Fireproof boards? How long does it take for the dough to proof? Oy! There are many questions, so just make a pizza dough in 2 hours and dig in. I don’t think so! The “right” bagel is worth millions.

Here are some opinions & testimonials from family and friends regarding their bagel experiences. Just think of this as a Food Network segment from “Tyler’s Ultimate…” Call it a bargain…The best I ever had…

Thomas Brown (high school friend) commented on your status:
Thomas wrote: “Bagel Depot 3854 Richmond Avenue, Staten Island, NY These are the best bagels I have ever had!!”

Marcee Kueckelhan Ben-Menachem (Seattle connection) commented on your status:
Marcee wrote: “The best bagel in Seattle is at Stopsky’s Deli on Mercer Island. In New York, it’s H and H. I think Drory will concur :)”

Carolyn Jacobson (one of my two sisters and social media maven) posted on your Wall:
“So, my first bagel theory is like good friends, their geography to you, as well as the timing, as far as good bagels go…it depends on how much you are craving a bagel, how hungry you are, and how convenient they are when you finally get it in your hand; the taste depends on all of this…

My second theory, is that it must be made in the Tri-State area, due to our water {brackish}, be seeded on both sides, crispy on the outside, chewy on the inside, but not doughy, and it must have the perfect spread…maybe a good White Fish Salad, or a good Belly Lox spread. Unless, of course, you can have the whole deal, which is an Everything Bagel, dual-side seeded, lightly toasted, with fresh Scallion Cream Cheese, Belly Lox, Vidalia Onion, and a Jersey Tomato on top…THE BEST!”

Pictured above from left to right is Sister Carolyn, Sister Joyce, yours truly, and a Turkey just before it was devoured…

Please note that Carolyn wrote her testimonial after I spent Thanksgiving with her… During that time, I sampled 2 excellent New Jersey Bagels and went into New York City (later on that day) to grab a few everything bagels from David’s Bagels on 1st Avenue (between E15th and E16th Street). While in New Jersey, I ate an Everything Bagel from Yorktown Bagels, Gordons Corner Road, Manalapan, NJ. It was excellent and just as good as David’s Bagels. I’m hoping that either of the aforementioned places will open up for business in Silver Spring, Maryland, in the next few weeks. I can dream, right?

Nicky Murray commented on your status:
Nicky wrote: “OMG! Kaufman’s Bakery in Chicago. Best water, best bagel. Toppings from Lazar’s Deli next door. 2nd best was actually at Ray’s Pizza on 58th St. in NYC.”

Jeff Francesconi commented on your status: Jeff wrote: “The best bagel I never had was when your old drum teacher, Joe, drove “Four Hours For A Bagel and a Smoothie!”

Pictured above: Jeff pays tribute to the Late Ronnie James Dio; Pete loves taking pictures; Evan J. has had way too much coffee–shocking!

Meredith Elrich (cousin) commented on your status:
Meredith wrote: “Golden Dove, Lox platter, Everything Bagels…shared with my favorite cousin. Didn’t matter what the food actually tasted like. Xoxo The End.”

Tara Sanborn (teaching inspiration) commented on your status:
Tara wrote: “Hoboken Bagels, 6th and Washington. Hoboken NJ. Miss you!!!”

Thank you for the testimonials. Let’s watch a short and excellent (9 minute) video about the Bagel cooking process:

YouTube video: How to make a NY Bagel:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hrJ1zpJGrfA&feature=related

Honorable mention: Meshuggah Bagels in Kansas City, MO, is incredible! It makes perfect sense finding a great bagel in Kansas, but not in Maryland.

BEAT A BAGEL ® has launched in 2020. So far, our support team consists of Cha Lee Johnson (editor, videographer, & wise guru), Ian Dylan (frequent guest host), Carl Ferrara (Webmaster and King of Kansas), et al… Here is our BEAT A BAGEL ® popular theme song: